Dreary Day BBQ

My department at work held their annual BBQ on the weekend. Why oh why was it 30 degrees on Friday and then what felt like 3 degrees on Saturday?

My enthusiasm could have improved.....
After Corey climbed a 300 year old White Oak we headed back to the shelter from some music.
Ladies and Gentlemen Mr Mooney on the keys.
'Dat 'dere Newfoundlander is moving down the hall from Corey and I come THIS Thursday.
Maybe we can start a Howland Avenue band?


Why my eyes look like 2 pissholes in the snow here- I have no clue. I snuck in ONE rum and coke the entire day.

All in all, drums were played (The VP can rock), keys tickled, voices carried. Also, Frisbees flew, Bocci ball was played, and Krista shivered.

hip hip

This weekend was craziness. Packed to the tits.

I did the following:

• Attended ALICIA's bridal shower
• Went to a 60th Bday dealy
• Went to NIKIs house warming
• Went to Gramma Gordon's bday at the Charcoal Steakhouse

Ali's shower was great. Her mother is a fabulous party planner.

Lover-ly tabes

My little buddies

Beautious bridemaids / Fierce Flower Gal

Niki's party was a blast (AWESOME APT!!!) but unfortunately I have no pictures :(
I would have loved to have had my video-cam with me to catch the feeling of Bolt and I scarfing down PEPI'S SUBS at 2 am.

Sunday night's dinner- Charcoal Steakhouse. Seriously, Brilliant dinner.

My bro-in-law STARTED with the Pig's Tails and then moved on to an 18 ounce steak.
18. Ounces.

I sent his pic to C dawg to make him jealous:



To cap off the evening, my sister and I had a wee contest when we returned home from dinner.

It was called "Who can find a hotter picture of their "It-Man" celebrity smoking AND THEN have Kel's hubby judge"

Lil' Kel's pick-

Mine-

I obviously won.
James Franco vs. Robert Pattison was an easy one for me to win. I suppose my sister's obsession with R PATT has driven her hubs to not exactly be a "fan".

What with her Twilight calendar, tee-shirts, etc.

MY LATEST FOOD OBSESSION

PLUS

EQUALS

Thanks to Lorien who provided the above goodies at our Games Night gathering last weekend- I am sold.
Best. Combination. Ever.

Pie Chart Email chain

From: Simon Edhouse
Date: Monday 16 November 2009 2.19pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Logo Design

Hello David,

I would like to catch up as I am working on a really exciting project at the moment and need a logo designed. Basically something representing peer to peer networking. I have to have something to show prospective clients this week so would you be able to pull something together in the next few days? I will also need a couple of pie charts done for a 1 page website. If deal goes ahead there will be some good money in it for you.

Simon

From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 16 November 2009 3.52pm
To: Simon Edhouse
Subject: Re: Logo Design

Dear Simon,

Disregarding the fact that you have still not paid me for work I completed earlier this year despite several assertions that you would do so, I would be delighted to spend my free time creating logos and pie charts for you based on further vague promises of future possible payment. Please find attached pie chart as requested and let me know of any changes required.

Regards, David.

From: Simon Edhouse
Date: Monday 16 November 2009 4.11pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Logo Design

Is that supposed to be a fucking joke? I told you the previous projects did not go ahead. I invested a lot more time and energy in those projects than you did. If you put as much energy into the projects as you do being a dickhead you would be a lot more successful.

From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 16 November 2009 5.27pm
To: Simon Edhouse
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design

Dear Simon,

You are correct and I apologise. Your last project was actually both commercially viable and original. Unfortunately the part that was commercially viable was not original, and the part that was original was not commercially viable.

I would no doubt find your ideas more 'cutting edge' and original if I had traveled forward in time from the 1950's but as it stands, your ideas for technology based projects that have already been put into application by other people several years before you thought of them fail to generate the enthusiasm they possibly deserve. Having said that though, if I had traveled forward in time, my time machine would probably put your peer to peer networking technology to shame as not only would it have commercial viability, but also an awesome logo and accompanying pie charts.

Regardless, I have, as requested, attached a logo that represents not only the peer to peer networking project you are currently working on, but working with you in general.

Regards, David.

From: Simon Edhouse
Date: Tuesday 17 November 2009 11.07am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design


You just crossed the line. You have no idea about the potential this project has. The technology allows users to network peer to peer, add contacts, share information and is potentially worth many millions of dollars and your short sightedness just cost you any chance of being involved.

From: David Thorne
Date: Tuesday 17 November 2009 1.36pm
To: Simon Edhouse
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design

Dear Simon,

So you have invented Twitter. Congratulations. This is where that time machine would definitely have come in quite handy.

When I was about twelve, I read that time slows down when approaching the speed of light so I constructed a time machine by securing my father's portable generator to the back of my mini-bike with rope and attaching the drive belt to the back wheel. Unfortunately, instead of traveling through time and finding myself in the future, I traveled about fifty metres along the footpath at 200mph before finding myself in a bush. When asked by the nurse filling out the hospital accident report "Cause of accident?" I stated 'time travel attempt' but she wrote down 'stupidity'.

If I did have a working time machine, the first thing I would do is go back four days and tell myself to read the warning on the hair removal cream packaging where it recommends not using on sensitive areas. I would then travel several months back to warn myself against agreeing to do copious amounts of design work for an old man wielding the business plan equivalent of a retarded child poking itself in the eye with a spoon, before finally traveling back to 1982 and explaining to myself the long term photographic repercussions of going to the hairdresser and asking for a haircut exactly like Simon LeBon's the day before a large family gathering.

Regards, David.

From: Simon Edhouse
Date: Tuesday 17 November 2009 3.29pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design

You really are a fucking idiot and have no idea what you are talking about. The project I am working on will be more successful than twitter within a year. When I sell the project for 40 million dollars I will ignore any emails from you begging to be a part of it and will send you a postcard from my yaght. Ciao.

From: David Thorne
Date: Tuesday 17 November 2009 3.58pm
To: Simon Edhouse
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design

From: Simon Edhouse
Date: Tuesday 17 November 2009 4.10pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design

Anyone else would be able to see the opportunity I am presenting but not you. You have to be a fucking smart arse about it. All I was asking for was a logo and a few pie charts which would have taken you a few fucking hours.

From: David Thorne
Date: Tuesday 17 November 2009 4.25pm
To: Simon Edhouse
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design

Dear Simon,

Actually, you were asking me to design a logotype which would have taken me a few hours and fifteen years experience. For free. With pie charts. Usually when people don't ask me to design them a logo, pie charts or website, I, in return, do not ask them to paint my apartment, drive me to the airport, represent me in court or whatever it is they do for a living. Unfortunately though, as your business model consists entirely of "Facebook is cool, I am going to make a website just like that", this non exchange of free services has no foundation as you offer nothing of which I wont ask for.

Regards, David

From: Simon Edhouse
Date: Tuesday 17 November 2009 4.43pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design

What the fuck is your point?
Are you going to do the logo and charts for me or not?

From: David Thorne
Date: Tuesday 17 November 2009 5.02pm
To: Simon Edhouse
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design

From: Simon Edhouse
Date: Tuesday 17 November 2009 5.13pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design

Do not ever email me again.

From: David Thorne
Date: Tuesday 17 November 2009 5.19pm
To: Simon Edhouse
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design

Ok. Good luck with your project. If you need anything let me know.

Regards, David

From: Simon Edhouse
Date: Tuesday 17 November 2009 5.27pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design

Get fucked.

long, cold weekend

"This weekend in a collage".

The weather was shiiiiiet BUT we made the most of it.
We got to see both mine and Fio's family and we all fell head over heels in love with Mo the donkey who lives next door.

Bourbon was drank (by some), cards were played and sweaters were warm warn.

The boys played "catch" with golf clubs in the yard and one ball went through Gramma's window! OOOoopppps. Thankfully the said window is in a closed-off room which no one has ventured into for about a decade. Mom didn't care, really,.. Though Ro's apology was pretty fun to watch being rehearsed.

After much talk about the hundreds of bats that reside in Gramma's roof, we decided to sit outside in the front yard to see what was surely going ot be a HUGE show....

NOT ONE. Not a SINGLE bat showed up.

Those little bastards must have been on vacation!

So here's a visual of what COULD have been:

the next 4 days... starting NOW

• Enjoy what may be the last REALLY HOT day on a patio
• Grocery Shop
• Make a lasagna
  
• Meet a Cat Sitter
• See my sweetheart
• Get up
• Go to work until 12 NOON ONLY
• LEAVE FOR A LONG ASS WEEKEND WITH 2 GREAT FRIENDS + C DAWG
• See mommy
• HAVE SO MUCH FUN
• Get up
  
• See Sister, Bro-in-law and Dog-Niece
• HAVE A BONFIRE
• DRINK BEER
• WHO KNOWS???

So pumped.

meow to me

I got up like a million times to get a glass of water last night. This morning C dawg was up at at 'em before 5AM to go to work. I got up with him... to get more water.

I texted him later in the morning to say "Be Careful today and I love you."
He responds with "Love you, Don't drink too much water."

Today looks gorgeous outside. I'll laze around here for a bit and then head to the Beach(es) to see J&C, my favorite fab gay couple. ("Coupl-a hotties!"). I'll bring a camera today- I never take photos.

I have so much basil so I should prepare something delicious with it. I think I made boccocini salad last time I went over there but really- you can't have too much of the caprese!
Maybe I'll throw in some roasted red peps and do my own take on it.

Right now I looked over at Jackson and said "I love you handsome" and I SWEAR-TO-GAH - he actually understood me. And I didn't even MEOW it to him- just SAID it.

Next weekend is going to be RAD. We head up north to "Gramma's House" - this time with Ro and Fio in toe (me = poet). My sis and bro in law might also come up for a night. BONNNNFIRE!
and
BBBBBATS! (There are about 1000 of them who live in the roof and at dusk the all fly out- it's quite the sight (again, poet).

OK I'm outty 5000. Too nice out to miss.

Overheard in a pilate's class:

ok!ok!
It was me!

Strange Illnesses and an All Girls Party

The ankle is getting much better. It's just turning into a giant bruise BUT even that is already fading.

Why is it, I wondered, that I only get REALLY STRANGE ailments?
Like... common cold?
Not this girl.
Last year's Ridiculously swelled ankle for no apparent reason?
Bring It On! And now this.....

On a less-whiny note: Girls night was a success last night, as per usual. This time Meryl hosted- and was a fine little hostess indeed.
Great apartment.
They have the same towel as Corey and I in the washroom.
Very important shit, man.
Wine and coronas + great chicks + smokey smokey + a dog named Charlie = goodtimes.



Thanks Meryl- we had a "bloody" good time!

Skeeter Syndrome

Remember when I had HIVES? Well typically what happens is I break out in large RED bumps and then they eventually turn into giant bruises.

This past weekend we were up north, and it seems some mosquitoes had their way with me. My arms and legs are covered... but with my usual red, itchy bumps.

And then there's this mess!





Seriously. My legs are one of my most treasured "parts". And now look at this!
This will be forever considered the MOSQUITO BITE.... from hell.

I have been googling like crazy and found that there is a such thing as SKEETER SYNDROME.
Some people just react differently (and more severely) to bites etc.

It must be me. The hives did the same thing.


WTF, skin?

CONGRATS!....

...to the lover-ly couple.

Danika and Eric's wedding this weekend was grand. Corey and I had a blast, I got to see all my ladies AND I (of course) caught the bouquet!

PS I almost ALWAYS catch the bouquet.
What can I say?
It ain't my desperate want to wed, rather my competitive nature.


Stealing pictures from facebook rules.



I had a nice long weekend AGAIN. In fact THIS week is a short one for me (i am off Friday), and so is next week (off Monday). We are heading to Port Elgin on Friday for Corey's family reunion. Then up to mom's for Sunday night.

Short workweek + Long weekends = the best ever.

to grandmother's house we go

Our weekend Abode (AKA Gramma'sHouse)-




Our (well... Tiffy's) bundle of joy-

the MIDDLE one...

Our furry friends-



The weekend was a huge success. The car rides there and back were... a little cramped BUT I only ALMOST got thrown up on (THANKS CHULA) once.

Now for a walk down memory lane. Otherwise known as- the pictures donning the walls of gramma's place-


I was pretty cute- WHAT HAPPENED?? I mean I AM still cute... but, like when did my nose... change? It was oh-so-teeny tiny back then!

Lil' Kel looks spot on- the same. i am wishing I had a photograph of the bowl cut mom and dad gave her circa 1984 or so..... but since I don't here is a close replication-



And now in closing- it's JACK! The Jack Russell terrier I lived with (with NIKI) for the years before venturing to Toronto. I MISS THE LITTLE GUY.

I